Ponder these things

Published on December 31 2005

I went to San Francisco. I found someone's heart. Now what?
All I ask is a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
If the world were a logical place, men would ride horses sidesaddle.
They told me I was gullible ... and I believed them.
Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and, when he grows up, he'll never be able to merge his car onto a freeway.
Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.
When the only tool you own is a hammer, every problem begins to look like a nail.
A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.
My weight is perfect for my height -- which varies.
Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?
Is it possible to be totally partial?
If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants off.
Is it my imagination, or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?