Published on December 23 2003

"Red meat is NOT bad for you. Now blue-green meat, THAT'S bad for you!" --Tommy Smothers

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Published on December 18 2003

DETROIT (Reuters) - DaimlerChrysler's Chrysler division, bowing to critics, said on Wednesday it was abandoning plans to sponsor a Super Bowl Sunday televised football game featuring underwear-clad models. The "Lingerie Bowl 2004" -- a tackle football game to be played by 14 women models wearing bras and panties -- was to have been sponsored by Chrysler's Dodge brand and broadcast on pay-per-view television at halftime during the National Football League's championship game on Feb. 1. "Halftime has never been this sexy," reads one headline from the event's Web site (http://www.lingerie.com). Dodge, whose advertising features the slogan "Grab Life by the Horns," was to have had its ram's-head logo emblazoned on bras worn by the models. Critics dubbed the event sexist, however, and senior Chrysler officials have been distancing themselves from it since last week. Proceeds from the event were originally due to benefit the American Foundation for AIDS (news - web sites) Research, but it too severed ties with the game. A source close to Chrysler said conservative lobbying groups had flooded the company's e-mail system with complaints about the upcoming spectacle. "You've got at some point just to decide 'OK, maybe we made a mistake, let's pull the plug,'" the source said. In a statement formally announcing the withdrawal of Dodge's sponsorship of the Lingerie Bowl, George Murphy, Chrysler's senior vice president of global marketing, dismissed it as "a distraction" that had taken the spotlight off the company's cars and trucks. He did not elaborate on the controversy, which first came to light several weeks ago. A spokeswoman for Horizon Productions Inc., the Lingerie Bowl's producer, said it was "disappointed" that Dodge had withdrawn its sponsorship, but that the game would go on.
Obviously, this game was to be played in a "domed" arena.........

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Published on December 13 2003

For all you Packer fans... 1. Did you hear that the Post Office just recalled their Chicago Bear commemorative stamps? People couldn't figure out which side to spit on. 2. A man walked into a bar and sat down for a drink. He noted a dog intently watching a Packers - Bears game. Whenever the Packers scored, the dog would jump onto the bar and do an animated dance. This happened over and over as the Packers scored again and again, and at the end of the game, the dog let out a loud howl and ran out of the bar. The man thought this was pretty unusual and asked the bartender, "Gee that's amazing. What happens when the Bears win?" The bartender replied "I don't know, the dog's only 4 years old." 3. A devout Packer fan died and had just arrived in heaven (that's where all Packer fans go, you know). He was talking to an angel trying to get the low down on what heaven was going to be like. He asked the angel if there were any former Packers in heaven. The angel replied, "Sure, all the greats are here." He then asked the angel if they played football and the angel replied that in heaven, every day is Packer Sunday and the Pack always wins. Being very excited the fan asked if Vince Lombardi was there and as he asked, he saw a man with dark rimmed glasses, a heavy overcoat, and a cap that looked strangely like the one Vince Lombardi wore in the Ice Bowl. When asked excitedly if that was him, if that was Vincent T. Lombardi, the angel replied, "No, that was just God. He just thinks he's Lombardi." 4. A Packers fan in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a joke about Vikings fans?" The guy next to him replies, "Well before you tell that joke you should know something. I'm 6' tall and 220 pounds and I'm a Vikings fan. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2" tall, 240 pounds and he's a Vikings fan, and the guy sitting next to him is 6'5", 280 pounds and he's a Vikings fan too. Now, do you still wanna tell that joke?" The Packers fan says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it three times." Q: What do you call a Minnesota Viking with a Super Bowl ring? A: A thief.. Q: Why doesn't Iowa have a professional football team? A: Because Minnesota would want one too. Q: What separates the one good team from the bad teams in the NFC Central? A: The Wisconsin border. Q: What does a stolen car and the Vikings have in common? A: No Title

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