Resume blues

Working on my "resume" for my "how-tp-do-an-online-class" class at APUS. It's required that all students take this as their first class towards a degree. I'm trying to worm my way out of it, having done the UW classes over the last year. To get out of it, a student is required to turn in an essay on "why I don't need to take this class"...and a RESUME. This is going to be the most BORING resume ever written. Should I include my stint as a salad girl in a restaurant? I learned a lot about lettuce on that job, after all. How about my very first job, washing dishes in the school cafeteria during lunch when I was in 7th grade? Or my fame as 'sconsin's first female paperboy at age 13? (Who knew I'd be breaking down barriers so young? 8-| ) I definitely need to include my job as a carhop at a drive-in fast food joint in wintertime to show my determination to succeed--you know what tips are like when you deliver trays of food to people who have their defrosters/ heaters running full blast to keep their windows from freezing over at 20 below zero? Not good, lol. Hope they don't giggle too hard at a resume of 26 years as a factory babe.